Bye Bye Blackbird

Today is my last day in Burlington....!!

It's been a wonderful day, too. The sky is so blue, and the sun is so warm, and it is the first day in a long time that I have absolutely no obligations or plans. I woke up before my alarm bright and early, and sat around in my pajamas until the sun peaked in the sky at high noon. I've been staying at a friend's place for the last few days (thank you Lauren and Becca!!!), and it's been a nice change from my regular routine. After feeling a bit antsy in the house, I walked down to Church street and took it all in. The busy movement of the lunch time crowd, the delicious smell from the street vendors, and the talented tunes from the performers all reminded me of how much I'll really miss this place. I took my time as I walked down the street -- it was a great way to say goodbye.

There has been a lot of change these last few days, and it will all culminate to a grand adventure as I pack up my life once again and move into a new city. After a week of RA training, I feel more than prepared to handle my RA duties, but I am still nervous about being somewhere completely new. I don't know what my new home looks like yet, and that alone is elevating my stress level. I'm doing my best to put those worries aside and stay positive -- adventures are always exciting, and this one has so much potential to shape my future that I need to welcome it with open arms.


But damnit, I'll miss this place.

I've been thinking a lot recently about the horrible sacrifice that game designers and others in any office-type field have to endure. For almost 8 hours a day, those of us who work in offices have to sit down. We have to sit down for almost 8 hours! With my recent increase in hours at the EMC, I've really been feeling the hurt associated with this horrible, horrendously inert sacrifice -- and so has my butt.

I had my last day at work this past Thursday, so on the good side of things, my butt can recover. To be honest, though, I was very upset about leaving the project behind. I'm excited about what my future in Montreal has for me, but I can't help but feel uneasy about leaving things so unfinished. I really want to see the project to the end, and I'm afraid of what will happen when I return. I just have to keep going forward and reminding myself that things will work out in the end.

Due to a recent mixup, I've found myself at home moving half of my apartment back into my old room. The sweltering heat has left my brains a bit melted, but I'm surviving somehow. Nick and I drove down to his house on Thursday and enjoyed a leisurely weekend with his family and friends, topping off the weekend with his birthday bar-b-que and a day at the beach. As we drove back up to my house, all I could think about was my late cat, Max. I wondered where my Dad buried him, and I thought about asking him if he could plant a tree over his grave. I know that if that tree grew, it would have the most personality. Whenever the wind blew, it would be the first one to laugh as the wind tickled its leaves. It would always willingly give shade, and even sometimes, it would listen to you as you tell it your life story -- only sometimes, though.

I'll be leaving my house today without ever asking my father where Max was buried.

Want a Good Thrill?

Go see Orphan. If you like scary movies, do it. It is disturbing, terrifying, intense, and the craziest thing about this movie is that it could happen.

Things are Changing!

So many little things in my life have changed recently. I'm thinking of life in new perspectives. I'm seeing heaven in the moon and beauty in the power of next generation communication. I can't help but smile.

I know things are changing because of two small changes I've made recently:

1. I like spicy food. I never liked spicy food in the past, but I guess all I needed was a tasty meal from a group of friends and some self created social pressure to get me started. Everyone else is eating it without complaint, why can't I? Even though I was really feeling the heat, I kept my mouth shut about the pain until my eyes starting watering and I could finally say, "Wow, this is really spicy. "Everyone agreed strongly, and it was then that I knew I could handle the spice. Now, I have come to love it.

2. I started playing hard mode in Guitar Hero and Rock Band. The fifth fret always intimidated me, but now that I've practiced, I know I can handle that too. Nick and I would even play on score duel mode on expert, and I'd get anywhere from 50 - 80%. Granted, I can't really say that was because of any sort of developed skill -- if you press lots of buttons and hit the strum bar a lot, you're bound to hit some keys.

I know those are two things that seem like insignificant skills or interests, but I feel different. I'm on track to keep living life for today, so why wait for tomorrow?

Youtube seriously needs a repeat option for this song.

"We can’t both become the same pawn
That’s made to fall
Oil that tastes like blood
Stole the summer scent from me to you
You’re stabbing me through you
You’re stabbing you through him
And betting most of this world.
We’ll add enough of the world"
-Chevelle