Lucid Dreams

I had my first lucid dream - ever- last night.

I was in the dream space, walking through a hallway, and actually felt like I was in my dream instead of watching it. I thought to myself "Hey, wait a second. Am I lucid dreaming? Wow, I am! This is pretty neat. Oh man! I can make decisions!"

So I decided to turn and talk to a man. The rest of the dream was pretty strange. I rearranged different household settings for passport photo backdrops and then talked to a man from Russia with two passports. One he said he used for "special occasions".

This is a pretty momentous event in my life. I hardly ever remember my dreams, so to remember one and have it be in an in between space in consciousness really strikes me. I hope it happens again tonight :).


Things with my advanced seminar game are taking off. I'm nailing down a theme to reward the player around and have concept art drawn in pencil. I'll be sure to post things as they develop.

Rediscovering: Woven

I walked home from class tonight,
Music blaring in my headphones: it's Woven,
It's "Cosmonaut"
And I feel it pumping through me.
I look up in the sky: it's night time,
It's cloudy
And just through the scattered puffs I saw
A lone star -- one of the first actual stars I've seen in this city.

I stopped and looked for a bit.

I'm glad that feeling down doesn't prevent me from seeing the beauty in the world.

I've rediscovered Woven, and it's perfect.

Elliott Smith Tribute

I watched Elizabeth Gilbert's TED.com talk about creativity in its entirety the other day, and I got stuck on a brief point she discussed in her talk. She talked about how so many creative geniuses out there are plagued with deep internal turmoil; so many of them die by their own hand, and it is a tragedy that seems so true in this world. I'm listening to Elliott Smith right now -- I've had his entire collected works for over a year now, yet I always felt intimidated about where to start, so I Googled a top 100 chart of his songs, and it's taking me on a trip. I plugged those songs into an iTunes playlist, and here I am. I'm sitting at my computer, headphones on, thinking about how Elliott Smith is one of those individuals that Elizabeth Gilbert mentions in her talk. He cut his life short in October of 2003, dying of fatal stab wounds in his chest that he inflicted upon himself.

Sometimes I can hear it in his music.


I feel really grateful that I have avoided the plight that seems to spread among creative folk. The wide range of human emotion that we feel is something to embrace and love all the same, and I'll just keep doing that until the day I pass. Love love love, it is the only thing I can do.

Look a little deeper

"I tried to find Him on the Christian cross,but He was not there; I went to the Temple of the Hindus and to the old pagodas, but I could not find a trace of Him anywhere.

I searched on the mountains and in the valleys but neither in the heights nor in the depths was I able to find Him. I went to the Kaaba in Mecca, but He was not there either.

I questioned the scholars and philosophers but He was beyond their understanding.

I then looked into my heart and it was there where He dwelled that I saw him; he was nowhere else to be found."
-Jelaluddin Rumi-

I just bawled immediately after I read this.

Thank you, friend :)

(a toast to 100 posts)

Did I Mention I Made It?

I'm here! Je suis ici!

I know it has been a while since I last updated -- and I'm sorry.

There is no excuse....

But this city is so alive, and it makes it overwhelming to attempt to capture it! I bring my camera with me everywhere, but I do not dare to take my eyes away for a second. I don't think a camera could really capture it all anyhow.

But alas, I'll do my best to take pictures when I can. I know I'll appreciate their existence when I'm gone from here.

All of my classes have been superb, and I'm gearing up for a relaxing yet work-filled semester. I've finally solidified some design decisions for my first solo title currently called Euphonic Secrets. I go back and forth with the title on a daily basis (and today it's making me cringe a little).

I'll be sure to write more about my experience here soon.