Words

"Please write down a list of words that you consider to be game changing, words that have the power to completely change a situation".

The room went silent, and I sat still. I looked down at the blank page in front of me and thought about the words that really mean a lot to me. I thought about the situations I've been in where words have made so much difference -- where one word or phrase changed my emotional state completely.

The phrase "I'm sorry" came to mind after a short while. I sat quietly at my seat looking at the words and realized that there wasn't much else. The words, no matter the sincerity, always evoke a sense of understanding within me, a resolution of sorts, I suppose.

I've thought about this a lot -- this idea that there are words out there that, when said, have the power to completely change the situation. I think that "I'm sorry" is still one of the more powerful phrases out there, but the more I think about it the more it hits home about how subjective these types of words and phrases are. I'm sure that for some people an apology can be meaningless; for some people, words like "mother" or "hate" have a lot more power to change a situation. All of these things are dependent upon the cares and qualities of the persons involved. I'm pretty sure that the only reason why the phrase "I'm sorry" has so much power for me is because it is easy for me to forgive.

So, what about you?

Just getting it out there...

It's been a while since I posted last. I think ever since I heard about this space being used as an avenue for negativity towards me, I have felt apprehensive about writing in here. As always, I encourage feedback and discussion about the things I write, but it's unsettling to hear that it's behind my back or in some sarcastic anonymous blog comment. Either way, it's not in my control, so I'm doing my best to brush it off.

The irony here is that these persons are probably realizing now that I have a decent idea about who they are. To you -- know that no matter your opinion of me, I'll probably still smile at you and hold a casual conversation with you because I have come to terms with the fact that you don't feel like having the truth come up in conversation between us (or else you probably would have brought it up by now). Now you know that I know, and now you know that I don't care enough to change the way I interact with you or diminish the respect I hold for you.

A lot has happened, a lot is continuing to happen, and I'm floating on -- still listening to dubstep, still writing as much as I can (but this time in a journal and not on the web), and still dancing my heart out when I get the chance. Some things have changed, of course -- I'm dating a pretty incredible guy, writing fiction again, and feeling the end of college loom around the corner. While I used to feel only excitement for the end of this chapter, I now feel a bit more... mixed. I think a lot of people I know are probably having similar feelings right now. Such is the inevitable.

This is just a quick update, I suppose. Lots to do, of course.